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tell me that you love me more.

a feeling never dies.

Julia Yasmine
12 October 1988
External Services:
  • jybeliever@livejournal.com

Let Me Help You Remember

I'm The kind of person who still doesn't know exactly who she is. I'm getting older by the day, yeah I know, but that doesn't mean that I've figured out my meaning in life, or what it is that I want to do. Don't pressure me. Cause I tend to walk away. I am mad about writing. I wanted to be an author since I picked up a pencil, but I can never finish anything. The one time I did, it felt forced. I am getting brave by posting some of my ramblings here and here. When I finish reading a book that I love, I usually cry because it's over. I tend to follow around people that will continually hurt me. Not by choice, it's just my default setting. I never wear anything on my sleeve. But I don't shy away from the truth. I do lie with tremendous ease. So you can never tell with me. I smile most of the time, but I'm not that perosn who is annoyingly happy. I am quite contrary to that. Sometimes I shut people out for a week or three. It's how I do things. Just let me be. I'll re-emerge okay, I just need to be alone and have no one talk to me. If I don't like you, chances are that you will know it. I'm not down for playing silly mind games. I put what I feel on the table. Except when it comes to realtionships. Realtionships turn me into a complete and utter wreck. I'm a hard person encased in an iron shell. Things do get to me, but I won't ever admit to it. I rarely give second chances so make the first one count. Sometimes I think I care more about people than they care about me. I never had a true best friend until January 2009. Movies are the device that take me away. Suspends my reality for however long. I own a vast number of movies. If it's possible then you might describe me as: a semi-pessimistic optimist who thinks like a realist. But let's not go there. I'm simplistic by nature. I need to live in a place that has perpetual summer. A man in a suit makes me weak in the knees. I buy GQ. I am completely over boys and their childish antics. I'm rarely embarrased at who I am. I hate people who claim to love fashion can't pronounce the name of the designers correctly. I may be the only person left who thinks that smoking can be sexy. Listening to sad music makes me happy. The word Brouhaha, Dionsaurs and Who's Line Is It Anyways make me incomprehensibly esctatic. I could also add to this and say that I feel like I'm one of those people who has all these dreams but no means or drive to achieve them.

Stylesheet by kuribati/beatcrusher